Maria's Journey

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Maria’s Journey

By: Greg

Chapter 1

The Honduran city of San Pedro Sula is the city of my birth. My beloved grandparents would cry for what has taken place here. I am thankful they never lived to see that what was once a lush, peaceful city has now turned into a violent, gang-infested nightmare.

I will only use my given name Maria, for I am ashamed of many of the things I have done in my short life. The slum that I have grown up in has been taken over by a local gang. Barrio-18 rules this entire region. At first, they just controlled the drug trade, so if you avoided that you were generally left alone. Over the last few years they have taken over everything. They extort payments from honest businessmen. They rob and harass people with no fear of the police. They now control the lives of everyone, and are hated and feared by all living here.

My papa was an important man in his time. He was ed by political rivals five years ago. The government never took any steps to avenge his . My older brother Carlos tried to be strong for Momma and me, but he was only two years older than me. These were violent times and it required strong, grown men to protect their families.

Since Papa’s death we could no longer afford to live in our old house. Momma was to sell, and now we rented a tiny shack just a few blocks away. I think it was actually a converted garage for the larger house out in front. I was always so ashamed of the way we were now living, that I never invited any of my friends over for fear of the look on their faces if they saw our little place.

Our little family was often the target of insults by neighbors. They held my papa responsible for failing to take a tougher stand against the corrupt local government officials. Papa was resistant to use his influence to force them out; he preferred a non-violent approach. Giving of his own life was apparently not enough for some people. Crime was now in charge and corruption within the police allowed criminals to run free.

I was sent away right after Papa’s death to live with Momma’s sister, Theresa, for almost four years. It was during this time that my body was going through many changes. It was only when I noticed how young men would look at me that I began to discover the curse that was on me. I wasn’t like the other girls with plump bottoms and wide hips. Momma had been very attractive in her early years, and from the pictures my aunt showed me, I was the very image of her at that age.

My beauty would have been a blessing in any other culture or time. Somewhere else I might have even become an important celebrity or at least attracted a rich husband. Here however, I attracted only the wrong people. Egged on by some girlfriends, I began experimenting with make-up and some flattering clothing. I really didn’t need it to attract the boys, because everywhere we went all the boys seemed to focus on me.

My aunt would say to me how my natural beauty was handed down by the ancient ones. My looks reflected my heritage. My high cheekbones and full lips were a trait past to me from generations long ago. My grandmamma was full-ed Ch’orti’ Indian. She was descended from the Mayans who were known to all as the God’s chosen people. Ancient beliefs held that men of these tribes were rewarded from the wind and earth Gods with the most beautiful wives.

I had full breasts and a narrow waist. Any tight fitting clothing would define the natural curves of my hips. Coal black eyes and brows were features that I must have picked up from my Papa’s side of the family. My aunt would often warn me that this was a blessing and a curse.

Unfortunately, I was also becoming a bit of a rebellious teenager. I started hanging around with the local boys who wished to take me out. Honduras is a poor country with slums everywhere. The one thing the government does do is supply free birth control pills to any girl wishing them. I was offended, but my aunt marched me right up to the dispensary, and I was given my pills. The government would rather no babies be born than to have still more poor mouths to feed.

I was eventually sent back to live with Momma after my aunt’s husband left her. She didn’t have any income now and could not continue to feed me. Once back in the slum with Momma I resisted her pleas to tone down my style of dress. Of course, I wouldn’t listen. I had a mind of my own. I was nineteen now, and felt I had the right do as I wished.

Momma only had the one sister and one brother Enrico. He was a hard worker. He ran a small business doing home repairs. He and his family lived not too far from us, but they didn’t stop by that often. I think he was always busy keeping his business growing to support his wife Sofia and his son Luis. Other than that, Momma, Carlos and I were now on our own. The tiny shack Momma was living in was an embarrassment to me. Carlos was there, and I had truly missed him. I loved my momma, but I couldn’t live like this.

The gang’s presence in our neighborhood was always felt. You seldom ventured out alone and never after dark. Yet, I was young and arrogant. I figured my looks offered me some kind of privilege or immunity. Sure, I got the whistles and cat-calls. I just took them as a compliment. Most of the gang members were losers and most were ugly. I kind of figured they would be intimidated by a confident girl like me. Most times my bluff worked. I found that a couple of the uglier ones actually seemed flattered that I would even nod a polite recognition of their existence.

One of the higher-ranking gang members was a guy nick-named Lobo. I’d run into him probably a couple times a week. Actually, I think he was searching out where I might be and was pretending to “happen” to be in my path. I thought it was a little cute the way he was trying to get to say hello to me so often.

“Machismo bravado,” I thought. He struts like a young rooster, yet he is unsure of himself around a girl like me. This little game went on for a couple months. Of course, I knew why he was really checking me out, but I really had no idea as to the seriousness of the game I was playing. My brother Carlos knew about Lobo and had tried to warn me off. Carlos had grown up with some of the gang’s members. Some had even been friends with Carlos up until they joined the gang. Once in the gang however you only associated with other gang members. Everyone else was “prohibido.”I was returning from the market carrying a small package one day, and of course I ran into Lobo.

“Hola, buenos dias, how are you today?” he asked rather timidly.

“Fine, and you,” I said.

“It is beautiful day for a walk,“ he would offer, trying to be charming.

This little verbal dance would continue each time we met. I don’t think he had rehearsed anything more to say past this. In my culture it was not proper for an unescorted young lady to strike up conversations with just anyone walking down the street, even today. But still, I was flattered. Our shy exchange bounced back and forth like to two school s, with maybe one having a blossoming crush on the other.

He must have finally worked up the courage to actually approach me. He practically took the package from my hand and offered me an escort home. He seemed to already know exactly where I lived. I was totally embarrassed by this because I didn’t want anyone knowing that I lived in an old converted garage. He seemed polite in a weird sort of way. He offered his name and even though I already knew it, I pretended not to. I said thanks in appreciation for his small act of kindness.

Lobo was not really a bad looking young man. He wasn’t as tall as I would have preferred, and I think that bothered him somewhat. He was always trying too hard to impress me. He always acted so tough if anyone else was in sight, but if we seemed alone he would lose his toughness, just a little, and become calmer. He always seemed to prefer black or darker clothing laced with steel riveting. His curly hair style looked to be another attempt to try to add to his height and overall physical size.

Momma had no clue as to what I had been up to. I was playing it loose with a major bad guy in the neighborhood but my luck was about to run out. Carlos’ pleas had held no importance with me. I ignored his warnings and would continue to stop and make small talk with Lobo. He really didn’t seem that awful. Maybe he just needed an understanding friend.

I severely underestimated the gang’s power and ruthlessness. Maybe the individual members themselves weren’t all that bad, but all combined they became a pack of dangerous animals. Still, I reasoned it would be better to at least be on good terms with one or two of them if I could. The day this all changed will stick in my memory until I die.

Lobo asked me if I wanted to see where he hung out. I innocently figured it would be his home, or maybe their silly clubhouse. I had no clue. I felt special as he escorted me along the streets of my neighborhood. All others gave clearance to us. He walked like he owned everything around us. We had gone maybe eight to ten blocks. I was still totally comfortable because this was still my neighborhood.

At a major street intersection, a ratty looking vehicle pulled up along-side of us. Guys I had never seen before were inside. Lobo ignored me and gang-signed some code, or hand-shake with a couple guys in the front seat. The rear doors popped open and I was invited in.

This next moment would change my life forever. My world would change, and the lives and futures of many others would come to be altered because of my foolishness here. To this day, I wish I had never set eyes upon Lobo. Every bit of common sense should have told me not to do it, but I did.

I got in.

The car lurched and off we went. I was flanked by Lobo and squished against some other big greasy guy with tattoos all up his neck. His arms, hands, even fingers were covered. This guy never even smiled the whole time I was there. Maybe ten or fifteen minutes passed when the guy driving pulled a U-turn right in the middle of a block. With tires squealing, we pivoted and pulled up in front of a two-story brick building. Gang symbols covered the crumbling walls. It looked junky out back as though the residents just tossed the garbage out the rear doors. My hands still shake even today, just describing that awful place.

We all piled out of the car and walked to the front of the building. Several sentries stood watch out front. I thought, “as if this would be worth protecting.” Walking into that place would change my life forever.

Recruitment into a gang was different for guys and girls. Young men would be groomed from early on doing small tasks and rise in status as their roles changed. Girls had but one way in; fucking!

Being young and stupid, I figured I had this under control. Lobo wasn’t that bad looking. If he wanted to get it on with me I’d do that. I wasn’t a virgin anyway. A boy near my aunt had taken that almost a year earlier. Besides the status Lobo seemed to hold would at least give Momma, Carlos and I, a little protection from the other low-life’s hanging around. I figured it would be better for us if he was at least partial to me.



Some dirty warm bottles of beer were handed to us as we climbed a narrow flight of steps up to the second floor. I was quietly rubbing the top portion of the bottle trying to wipe any grime from where my lips would touch it. I didn’t want to offend any of them right off.

Upstairs were maybe fifteen to twenty guys hanging around. I was relieved to at least see a couple other girls there playing pool over by a bar. A cloud of tobacco smoke hung like a curtain across the ceiling. Lobo and I sat at a table and opened our beers. Some guy walked up and offered Lobo a hit from a joint. He accepted and then passed it to me. I thought just to be polite I should.



The buzz was almost immediate. It even made swallowing the beer possible. Lobo began talking, and I seemed to be paying attention, but I was more interested in the surroundings. So this was it. This was the big bad lair. I took a second hit from something someone shoved in-front of my face, after that things got real fuzzy. Lobo was asking if I wanted to go to the lounge with him. I was feeling really dizzy at this point and figured maybe the chairs or a couch would be more comfortable.

I remember Lobo and I were going down stairs again, and then into a basement area. It was dimly lit and smelled of mold. I was thinking like a dumb ass, so this is where the secret meetings are held. I flopped down at the first open spot on a ratty couch. My legs were so wobbly it felt good to sit. Lobo sat next to me. He offered another hit off something, but I refused it this time.

Lobo was complimenting my looks and the sharp way I dress. I kind of figured he wanted sex. I could tell because we were completely alone, and he was acting very nervous. I started kissing him and he responded awkwardly trying to push his tongue into my mouth right away. The stale taste of beer was still very present, so I kind of cut it off there. He began pawing at my breasts and I remember opening my blouse to expose myself. At this point he began trembling. ”Timid little boy,” I thought to myself.

I was trying to loosen my pants and I figured this wasn’t going to be the best fuck I would ever get. He seemed unsure and almost clueless about how to enter a girl. He lunged at me poking his cock around like a horny dog. Finally, he got it right. I laid back and tried to enjoy his best effort.

He hurt. The dumb-ass hadn’t lubed up or anything. From some place he offers me another hit off a joint. I figured I might just need this, so I drew a drag and held it. I noticed he didn’t. I vaguely recall his effort because he didn’t seem to last that long. I do remember him grunting while his hands were pushing my breasts around. It wasn’t doing anything for me.

Suddenly, someone was trying to open my mouth and kiss me again. This time I closed my eyes. Then, I felt a cock being slapped against my breasts. A pair of hands began squeezing my breasts down really hard.

“Hey!” I said, “Not so rough.”

When I looked up it wasn’t Lobo. The big guy from the car with all the tattoos was shirtless and was slobbering all over my breasts. I tried to get up but was held down by yet another pair of hands. The tattoo guy straddled me. I looked down and saw his stiff cock pointing right at me. He starts lining up his cock to fuck me and I started to scream.

“Get the fuck off me!” I yelled.

Before the next words could even leave my mouth, a hand covered my face. Another hand began stroking my hair. Hands seemed to come from everywhere. The tattoo guy rams his cock up into me. It was so hard I thought it was a steel bar. I squirmed all that I could, but he continued. He was pumping at me like he had never gotten laid in his life.



My whole body was being tossed about as the guy jerked at my hips. Now some shit-head with a hard-on was trying to jam another cock into my mouth. Fingers pulled my mouth open just in time for a load of cum to land diagonally across my face. No sooner had one guy stepped away when another would launch a spray from the opposite side.



The tattoo guy was now groaning and began spewing his filth into me. I wiggled to try to push him out, but I think this just added to his pleasure. I couldn’t breathe, I needed air. All I got was a constant rainstorm of cum. Droplets pelted my face and neck from all directions. I think the tattoo guy was now done, and instantly another guy jumped on me and starts lining up his cock. That one hurt too. By now I could feel the loads still inside me being worked around. Cum-shots continued splattering my body.



My breasts were becoming raw from all the pulling and twisting. “What in the hell were they trying to do?” I thought. “Rip them right off me?” One or two guys were over me, biting and pulling at my nipples. I could feel hot cum pooling on every spot on my body. More grunting and another flood of cum spilled into my cunt. I knew it had to be full by now. Cum had to be being pushed out of me at this point. I lost count of the cocks that entered me. My eyes burned from the biting sting of semen splattered about on my face. I was blinded. Each time I got a hand loose to rub out an eye a new load would replace it.

One cock, then another, and they just kept at it. I couldn’t speak or scream out. Anytime I opened my mouth for a second some dick would launch a spray into my throat. I had already d on half a dozen already. Would it ever end? Surely everyone there had to have had their turn by now.

“Lobo?” I called. “Lobo help me!” I cried.

“Lobo, you fucker, where the hell are you?” I screamed.

I was trying to maintain some sense of myself. I didn’t want to completely lose all control. I was completely covered with cum. The only good thing about this was that eventually no one seemed to want to touch or pull at me anymore. My breasts were incredibly sore from bites, pinches and the constant pulling that they had endured.

Suddenly a pair of hands clenched my face, and through tears I could make out two girls. These were probably the ones I had seen earlier upstairs. They were trying to force my mouth open. The one got my lips apart and held my jaw down. Someone from behind pulled my hair back against the cushion and the stupid bitches began spitting right into my mouth.

One, then the other spat huge gobs at me. Most entered my mouth and the rest mixed with the tracks of semen on my face. They were scooping the remains of cum off me and sc it off into my mouth. I gritted my jaw. I think they knew better than to get a finger near my teeth. I’d have bit their fingers right off if I could, and I think they knew that.



While they were doing this, I spotted Lobo across the room standing with some of the others laughing and just watching. They had beers in their hands and were rubbing their crotches as the girls assaulted me.



My composure broke. I couldn’t stop crying. I was pissed and scared up until now, but I realized that this was all just entertainment to them. Lobo wasn’t going to offer me any protection or friendship. He just used me to supply the gang with a fun night. This was all for nothing. I went from rage to collapsing into fear. I guess they had finally gotten their fill of my shame. The girls released me and followed the guys upstairs.



Just as I thought it was over, a lone guy comes running down the stairs. I guess he had gotten there late. The others must have said I was all his. The look on his face as he approached me broke all the remaining strength that I had.

He had this look of revulsion on his face. I was a total mess: reddened skin matted with cum sickened him. I was not even fuckable. He looked at me for a couple moments but didn’t seem to be able to muster up a hard-on. I was weeping uncontrollably. I looked up at him and thought “Really, you want some of this?”

He looked me over for a few seconds, put his head down and slowly walked back up the stairs. I sat there for a long time trying to get myself together. The backsides of my thighs hurt from all the rubbing. Belt buckles and studs on the pants of some who hadn’t removed them had raked the backside of my legs raw.



I guess I finally realized no one was going to come down and help me so I tried to stand. Cum was flowing out of me trailing down my inner thighs. I took a couple of small steps. I needed something to wipe myself with. Looking around there was nothing. By the one corner was a closed door. I thought it might be some type of closet or maybe a bathroom. I sort of shuffled over to it, carrying my soiled clothing. My shoes were scattered somewhere on the floor and bending over to pick them up was excruciating. The door wasn’t locked so I tugged it. It was jammed, so I pulled harder. The door popped open towards me. It was dark inside. I found a pull chain for the light.



The room was empty except for two bags lying on a small wooden table. One, a dirty green backpack and the other was a duffel-type bag. Maybe someone had some clothing in there that I could use to wipe up with, I thought. I unzipped the duffel-bag and was stunned to see bricks of white power wrapped in plastic stacked neatly in rows. Heroin or cocaine, I couldn’t be sure which. I let go of the bag as if it were an electric shock.

I pulled the backpack up and opened it. I could not believe my eyes. Tight stacks of bills were arranged in neat bundles. Some were Lempria, but most were US dollars. Every space available was packed tightly. I touched some, maybe out of disbelief. I trailed my hand down one stack and pried back one bill. One hundred-dollar US bills, thousands of them. I drug my thumb down slowly. Were they all hundreds?



My hands shook, my body chilled at the revelation that I had stumbled onto the very thing the gang relied on; cash, thousands, probably hundreds of thousands. This was likely part of hard-earned money they had taken from people all over the slum as extortion too. Poor people’s desperately-needed money was here, mixed with ill-gotten drug sales.



I sat on the floor and began trying to get my shoes back on. I pulled my bra on right over the moist stains still clinging to me. I couldn’t find my panties, so I just pulled my jeans up and felt the wetness still trailing down the inside of my leg. My hair was a mat of drying semen. I tried to hold it back and it actually clung together due to all the goo drying in it.



As I reached for the light and turned it off, I looked out across the basement. Towards the back of the room I could see a set of stairs leading up to the rear. I shuffled weakly in that direction. The heavy door was held shut by three heavy draw-bolts which were covered in rust and webs. The door hadn’t been opened in probably years. Only a few steps up and I could see through the dirty windows that it was now very dark outside. I could hear the muffled blare of music coming from somewhere upstairs. The celebration was already underway. I guess I had only been the warm-up for the evening. I the bolts back and pulled the door open.

The rear of the building was a junk pile. Trash and garbage littered the whole area. The alley seemed even darker and would be the best way out. Something in me would not let it go. The bastards had taken all of my dignity. I knew that Lobo would still see me around and think of me as shit. Fuck him!

Maybe it was some of the fogginess of the drugs they had used on me. I know the rage was building inside of me, but I couldn’t stop myself. I couldn’t believe my legs as they turned on their own and I staggered back into that basement.

The stash in the closet! I deserved it! I had certainly earned it. “Fuck them! Fuck them!” I kept repeating. I went back in, yanked open the door, grabbed both bags and pushed the door closed. I practically stumbled going up the steps and out into the cool evening. “Bastards, god-damn bastards every one of them!” I said to myself. I could now hear the party in full-swing even half a block away.

I walked for blocks and blocks. I knew I was miles yet from home. Eventually I made my way to a busy road thinking maybe someone would give me a ride. I stood along the curb but soon realized the futility of this. Occasionally a lone truck would speed past. No one slowed down. This was still a bad area and no driver was going to stop. I looked a mess. I smelled of cum, my hair all matted down now. No one would ever…..

“The money.” I thought for a second and figured maybe it would improve my chances. I unzipped the backpack and tore the band on a pile of bills. I snaked out a single one-hundred dollar bill and walked for a bit until I was clear of any buildings. I stood in an open spot and waited for the next group of vehicles to go by.

As the next vehicles approached, I held up the bill and slowly waved it. The group of cars blew past me. The next ones did the same. But then, suddenly the last truck in the group slowed, brake lights came on. I couldn’t believe it. An old pickup backed slowly towards me. The windows were already down. An old man was behind the wheel. He stopped and studied me for a second.

“Hola, Señor,” I started

“Do you wish a ride?” he asked.

“Please sir, if you wouldn’t mind,” I d out the words.

“You can hop in the back if you want to,” he said motioning over his shoulder.

I climbed in quickly before he changed his mind. He started off down the road with me riding on the crates he had stacked in back. The night air was cleansing in a small way. The stench from my body was being blown away. The wind and my tears had finally washed away the remnants of the gang’s attack from my eyes.

I began staring at the bill fluttering in my hand. I had never touched a bill so big. I knew they existed, but never dreamt I would have something like that in my own hand. We went along for maybe fifteen minutes when off to the right I began to see the familiar shapes of the church steeples of my neighborhood. I tapped on the rear window and the old guy started slowing down and then came to a stop along the shoulder. I slung the duffel bag over my shoulder, grabbed the backpack and climbed out the back.

I walked up on the passenger side and still holding the bill, tried to offer it to him, but he waved me off. He was a kindly-looking old gentleman, a farmer most likely. His weathered skin and calloused hands displayed a hard, but honest life. I let the bill fall from my grip and it landed on the seat next to him. I thanked him, and he was off.

Chapter 2

I tried to creep as silently as possible into my little home. I had hoped not to wake Momma but I had just gotten inside when the light came on. Momma was still dressed and had been sitting in the dark waiting for me.

I will never forget the look on her face. I was a total mess. My eyes reddened; hair all matted down. The damp stains down my pant legs were still visible. She started crying. I couldn’t touch her. I started crying too. Tears I didn’t know were still in me flowed down my cheeks. During all this, Carlos had woken up. He was completely shocked at my appearance also.

As only a mother can love her offspring, Momma’s first instinct was to grab washcloths and begin bathing me. She waved Carlos away with no voice, just heartbreaking moans. She ran the warm water in the tub and laid out towels on the floor. She carefully helped me remove the clothing which was stuck in places to my skin. Her agony and hurt grew as each article of clothing was peeled away.

My breasts were covered with bite-marks and scratches. She knew! She knew in her heart what I had gone through. The had left marks on places all over me.

She gently stroked my face with soap and a soft cloth. Pouring warm water over my head was the most comforting feeling I could ever remember. Soapy water cascaded down my shoulders taking the filth with it. She wrapped a towel around my head, pulled my face into her bosom and held me there. I could feel the vibrations in her body as she wept.

We didn’t speak of the things that had happened. There would be time for that later. For now, she just wanted to hold me, and reassure me that I would survive this. She was just thankful that I was alive. Our moment in the bathroom was short lived. As she led me out the door into the cool room, Carlos was standing there with the two bags I had dropped on the floor. He had opened both of them. The contents were clearly visible. Momma looked to me. Her face was white as a ghost.



“Maria, what…?”

Carlos was speechless also, but he already knew. He picked up a brick of the dope and held it out.

“The gang’s?”

Somehow in the clear light of our small room the reality of what I had done was beginning to dawn on me. Momma started to panic.

“Take it back,” she said. “Take it all back,” she kept repeating herself.

Momma’s voice began to show her terror.



I was shivering now and almost ready to pass out. I hadn’t thought of the consequences. I hadn’t thought at all. Carlos just stood there with a blank look on his face. As if it wasn’t bad enough already, the first words out of his mouth were “They will us all for this.” We all knew it was true.

“Take it back,” Momma kept repeating. Carlos looked at her disbelieving. “We can’t, Momma, they will us all and cut our heads off.”

Carlos sat on the bed shaking his head. “We are all dead.”

“Dammit, stop saying that!” I said.



Momma cradled my head almost shaking it. I knew she was beside herself, and yet still wanted this all too just go away. Carlos finally said the most responsible thing.

“We’ve got to get Uncle Enrico. He will know what we should do.”

“We will, first thing in the morning,” Momma said, “Now we need to sleep.”

“No! We have to now!” said Carlos, almost crying. “They will be here tonight and us for sure.”

Carlos began getting dressed. He needed to get to a friend’s house to borrow a phone. We were too poor and didn’t have that luxury. He hurried out as soon as he was dressed. Uncle Enrico was speechless when he arrived and heard what I had done.



“My God , what were you thinking?” he said.



I had shed enough tears that evening to last my lifetime. The horror I had brought down on us all would be the end of everything I have ever known. Uncle Enrico paced the floor. He was shaking his head trying to devise some way. He hadn’t seen what they had done to me, and Momma’s pleas of returning it went on deaf ears. I had never seen Uncle Enrico so upset. Finally, he grabbed Momma and sternly held her arms to her sides.

“Mija,” They will us if we try to return it, don’t you understand this? We have very little time. We must leave. We must all leave. They will hunt each of us down and every one of us. We have to leave here now.” His words didn’t register at first.

“For how long?” I asked sounding dumb.

“Forever,” was his stern answer. “Pack, pack quickly. Now! And take only what you need, hurry!”

How does someone tell you something like that, “Just leave your life?” My world was changing right then in the early morning hours of that day. Things would be different from all that I knew from now on.

We loaded up Uncle Enrico’s work van with every scrap of our small lives. We had to disappear forever. We traveled quietly through the night to an old warehouse Uncle Enrico had rented for tools and materials he used in his business. I had assumed we would go to his house at least until morning, and I was foolish enough to ask. My world continued to crash down around me as he looked at me with disbelief in his face.



“I have to disappear also. They will every one of us. My family too! Don’t you understand this either?”

I felt so guilty and terrified at what had I done to the ones that I loved so much. Uncle Enrico left to rescue his family. Everything they knew and loved was going to be being ripped from them that morning also. I couldn’t deal with it anymore, and so I slept.

I awoke to the sounds of Momma talking. My Aunt Sofia and my cousin Luis were there. I didn’t see Uncle Enrico anywhere. Carlos was eating some food which someone had brought in. As I began to stir, my body reminded me immediately of the I had suffered the night before.

My legs still ached, and my breasts were extremely tender. Momma came over with a small glass of juice which I tried to drink in small sips. Aunt Sofia was just staring at me. I knew she hated me in that moment. I felt like shit for having destroyed their lives too. Cousin Luis came over to me and began to hug me. I winced from the pain. My breasts felt as if they had been treated like punching bags.



“I am so sorry,” was all I could say. “So very sorry.”

After a little bit, Uncle Enrico showed up driving a rental truck. It dawned on me that all worldly possessions of both families had to go with us. Aunt Theresa, his sister, was with him. He must have driven across town to bring her into hiding also. I guessed that everything she owned was in the back of the truck also.



This was crushing my spirit. Just how many lives had I destroyed last night? And after Theresa fed and housed me for all that time. Uncle Enrico came over and handed me a wrapped sandwich. He touched my head in a loving gesture. I felt so horrible. I knew they were all hating on me for causing all of this. The adults were discussing various options and plans. Both Aunt Sophia and Momma cried several times. The voices got loud and then urgent whispering went on. Luis was called in and they listened to his opinions. I just sat quietly on some boxes nearby. My knees were drawn up and I just stayed that way. I wouldn’t have had the nerve to offer any suggestions. After what seemed like hours Uncle Enrico called Carlos and I over where they were talking this all out.



I guessed that some decision had been reached and agreed upon. Momma and Aunt Sofia were still crying. Aunt Theresa sat there expressionless. I think in she was just in shock. Carlos and I walked over. I gave Momma, Sofia and Aunt Theresa a gentle hug. They each patted my arm softly.

I always had trusted Uncle Enrico. He was a man of the world. He knew things. He had spent his life dealing with issues surrounding his situation. Raising a family here was a challenge and he was an honest, common-sense man.

“Okay,” he finally said, “This is where we stand. Maria, the problem is this,” he said holding up a package of the dope. “This is not the gang’s property; it is Sinaloa,” he said in almost a whisper.

“See here, look at these markings. I know of these people”

I had heard the name before also.



“The Sinaloa cartel will for this. “All hell is about to break loose, Maria,” he said looking very grim. “The Sinaloa cartel is absolutely ruthless. They will not only us, but even people we know. is their specialty. There is over half a million US dollars in that bag, and this heroin you took is worth at least that much.”

“Six hundred twenty-five thousand,” corrected Carlos.

My brother had had been passing time by counting the money. He had been quietly arranging the stacks of bills in piles on the floor. Uncle Enrico looked me square in the eye and said,

“Congratulations young lady, you may have just fulfilled your papa’s wish.”

“The cartel will likely exact a terrible revenge on the Barrio 18 gang. They may or every last one of them. The smart ones would disappear; the stupid ones and their families will likely die in a most horrible way,” he said.

“We will survive,” he repeated trying to convince himself and us.

“We must survive.”

Chapter 3

The plan was difficult. We had to split up. Uncle Enrico said they would be looking for us all together so we stood a better chance dividing in two. I was hearing the words, but the details were a blur. Luis would go with Carlos and me and we would take the drugs and some cash and make our way to the United States border. We could not afford to be stopped by authorities because the cartel owned most of them.

Momma, Sofia, Theresa and Uncle Enrico would head west then north along the west coast. It was better to not know each-others exact route. They could not be carrying any of the drugs because they would pass check-points and borders. Luis, Carlos and I would travel the route by rail like most of the poor single immigrants. There was less chance of us being stopped if we mixed in with the crowd.

Luis and Carlos knew of web sites on social media where we could make contact with our parents once we were at the border or had even made it across. They wrote these down and agreed on false names to identify ourselves to each other. They explained to Uncle Enrico that public libraries had access to the internet. We would try to leave messages, if possible along the way. Luis warned them against using any cell phones, as these can be tracked. The reach of the cartel was everywhere.

We all lent a hand packing what would be carried in the back of the truck, but how do you stuff three families entire lives into a small truck? I felt so miserable. I had destroyed everything my Uncle and Aunts had built, and Momma too. Each time I picked up a photograph frame or personal memento, tears began to flow down my face. Uncle Enrico was busy attending to the details of our journey. He looked over and saw my face. He walked up to me and gently pulled my head against his chest. He rubbed my shoulder and walked me away from the truck. We crossed to a quiet corner. He pushed me down onto a little wooden box.He squatted down right in front of me and cupped my face and lifted my chin. I looked right into his dark eyes.

“Maria, this can be a new start for all of our lives,” he said softly.



“We all love you, and understand what you went through.”

Uncle Enrico went on to explain that life wasn’t good for his family either. The gang’s extortion demands were ing him financially. He had to pay to live and work each time in the neighborhood. He was to soon lose his home also. He hated the way things had become. He held my face up and my gaze.

“You have given us a chance at a better life Maria. We just need to work together to make this happen.”



“I love you all so very much,” was all I could think to say.

I resolved right then to do whatever would be necessary to see that we would all be together again, and in a better place. Uncle Enrico felt that we could spare no time and that we needed to get moving immediately. We couldn’t be sure how long it would be before the gang realized the stuff was missing. Once they discovered it, they would fan out frantically searching for us themselves. Maybe they could delay the cartel until it was obvious they had lost the money and the drugs.

Eventually though the cartel would learn the truth and the vengeance would begin. Hopefully, the cartel would think one of the gang had taken it at first. It might take the and ing of every last gang member for them to learn the truth. Yes, running made us look guilty, but to stay was certain death. The gang would pay for their stupidity as an example to other gangs. Then, the cartel would come after us.

We needed to be ahead of them, faster and farther than they would ever look. Getting out and away and from San Pedro Sula would be the most dangerous part. If the gang hadn’t discovered the theft, we had a good chance. Otherwise, they would be waiting for us. We dare not go back to any place the gang might be waiting.

Uncle Enrico said it was about 280 km. to Guatemala City. If we left very soon, we could make it before dark. The border between Honduras and Guatemala was poorly guarded and a routine crossing. He had made the trip often for supplies and material he used. It was mostly main highway and we would blend in with the other commercial traffic. We would travel all together at least that far. The railroads heading north-east would carry Luis, Carlos and me from there.

Most highways heading up into Mexico were patrolled by authorities and many drug enforcement stops were along this route. Uncle Enrico would drive towards Mexico City. The four of them would appear to be just poor immigrants traveling north.

The money was easy to hide, but the drugs scent would attract drug dogs if they were ever stopped. Uncle Enrico had me wrap the duffel bag several times in layers of trash bags. He worried that even the residue smell might alert dogs to the trucks contents even after we had split up. He didn’t want authorities to have any suspicions about them. A search might find the money instead.



Within the hour we were bouncing down the rough roads of town. Luis, Carlos and I huddled in the rear among our family’s only portable possessions. I kept the duffel bag on my lap in order to keep the scent from mixing with the rest of the load. It would be about a six-hour drive. If we made it, it could be the first step of a better life for all of us.

Staring at the wrapped duffel bag was a constant reminder of the attack. My only solace was the knowledge that in the next few days Barrio 18 would be no more. The hardest part would always be not knowing exactly what did happen back home. We could never go back, and I would always wonder who survived. Friends, neighbors, those who knew us might suffer terribly. Uncle Enrico was a man of his word. If he told you something would happen, you could trust it to be true. Yet the not ever knowing would always haunt me.

Each hour ticked by slowly. Each one meant our chances were better. We stopped for petrol once we were well into Guatemala. We might have been leaving the reach of the gang, but the danger of the cartel would always surround us. Uncle Enrico knew Guatemala City well. He had business contacts there. He felt the need to rent a different truck. He figured each time we could cut a trace to us was a good thing.



It was a warm evening and he had gotten us enough food for a meal. He had also purchased some wrapped food for us on our journey. My Uncle had also purchased a small pocket compass, and I saw him pass this to Luis. He stood in front of him proudly, his strong hand grasped his son’s shoulder.

“Norte, Norte, always Norte,” he quietly told him.



We sat in the dusty truck rental place eating our food. We were all staring at each other as if we might never see each other again. Momma broke down several times crying. I could hardly eat either, but I knew we needed to do so when we had the chance. We transferred the load of the truck into the new one and sort of stood there not wanting to face the next thing.

My Grandpapa used to tell me about a type of bird, I have forgotten its name. He said that if the bird’s nest or the young ones were threatened the mother-bird would feign injury and run across the ground as if crippled. She would flap her wings and drag herself to draw predators away from her young. I loved and trusted my Uncle. I knew that he wanted us all to succeed, but I couldn’t help feeling he was putting Carlos, Luis and my life ahead of theirs. I believed in my heart that this was what he was really doing. Uncle Enrico was leading the danger away from us. He had already told us the cartel’s strongest hold was on the western routes heading north. Our path would lead us away and eastward along the less obvious gulf coast. Their route would lead them right into the region Sinaloa controlled the most. I walked up to Uncle Enrico and put my arms around his shoulders. I kissed his cheek and told him how much I loved him.

Uncle knew where the migrants usually hung around. The rail-yards were closely watched and only if you contracted with, and paid locals, could you get in the line moving north. It would just be the first of many controlled illegal routes one had to pay to use. Luis, Carlos and I split the drugs equally among us. We buried five packages in each of our backpacks and hid lower denomination bills among our clothing. Uncle felt it would be more normal for us to not be having larger bills. It might seem like a trail if we used hundreds all along the way.

I could hear Momma crying softly. I couldn’t bear to look at her. I had hoped to see and remember her smiling. Aunt Sofia eventually broke into tears also. Uncle Enrico drove us only a little bit before pulling to the side of the road.

We climbed out the back of the truck and approached the cab. Momma’s head was buried in her hands. Her body was heaving as if her heart was being ripped from her. I climbed over my aunts to Momma. I hugged each one as I made my way back out. My brother and Luis did the same. Carlos and Luis promised to look out for me, and just like that, we watched them drive away.

Trucks were available for hire to haul people to the train yards forty miles north of the city. Groups of twenty to thirty people were awaiting their turns. Small groups were assembling down at the other end of the street. As we approached, I noticed something. There were no families, no wives, and no ren. Only young men! I couldn’t pick out a single girl from among any of them.



This was a shock. Only young men seemed to be awaiting the trucks arrivals. A sick feeling was starting to wash over me. This was not what any of us had envisioned. I had supposed groups of families all happy and cheery at the prospect of a new life would be milling around. Instead, seedy bunches of young men stood around smoking and all trying to look tougher than the next group.

Luis acted quickly. He pushed Carlos and me into a darkened alley. He backed me up to a wall and started looking around. I had thoughtlessly sort of made-up for meeting new people, new friends. My perfume was noticeable and my snug fitting jeans showed the hips of a young girl. Luis reached into a pile of garbage and began rubbing my face with a rancid scrap of newspaper. Stains of “God only knows what,” were impregnated into that paper. He pressed it into my face and began scrubbing. He dipped it into the stagnant water on the ground and continued smearing the filth across my cheeks and forehead.

Tears welled up in my eyes as the stench entered my nose. I began crying. I knew that what he was doing was necessary, but that didn’t make it any easier. Carlos was totally clueless and tried to stop Luis from this assault. With tears flowing down my cheeks, I pushed my brother away. I knew why Luis had to do this, and I was determined to bear this out. My face was being covered with the filth and grime from the dirty alley floor.

Luis tugged again and again at the stretchy material of my hoodie trying to conceal my breasts. He then pulled the hood up covering my head and released the straps of my backpack. He lowered it trying to cover my butt. It now hung loosely deflecting attention from my hips. Luis cradled my face firmly. His nose was only inches from mine. He shook my head.

“Stop crying now!” he whispered firmly, “You stop it!”

I wiped my eyes and steeled myself. I blinked a couple times and inhaled the foul odor he had covered me with. I ended my emotional outburst instantly. I pushed my hair behind my ears and back into the hood. I lowered my head and shoulders and I never looked up. I followed Carlos and Luis out of that alley walking as “manly” as I could.

We crossed the street and picked the smallest group standing near the road. I never looked up or spoke. We just waited near the others. Luis and Carlos didn’t smoke so there was no reason to address anyone else. Shortly, a couple box trucks turned onto the street and headed towards us. They cut their headlights as they approached.

So began our journey.

Chapter 4

We had to wait nearly two hours for our turn. We handed over the toll and squeezed into the back of the truck with maybe thirty others. The truck shook and lurched forward. It took nearly an hour before we reached our destination. The rear door opened, and we were herded like cattle towards a fence that had been cut. No one spoke. You just followed the person in front of you. A worn dirt path led down into the rail yard. Groups of young men stood around waiting. We were clueless and just stood waiting also. Bells rang and occasionally a horn blew. Luis picked up on the pattern, but sometimes too late.

I saw Luis slip the small compass from his pocket. He was figuring out which trains seemed pointing north. Uncle Enrico’s forethought had just given us an edge over most of the others there.

We began drifting over to a still line of cars. Luis had picked up on the pattern and figured out which train was heading northbound next. He got us near one of the middle cars and pushed me up to the ladder. Up on top were others who had anticipated this train also. Soon the train’s whistle let out a blare and it jolted to life. Yes, Luis was right! We were indeed moving in a northerly direction.

In a rush, a mob hit the train cars and fought for the few spaces left. Most didn’t make it as the train picked up speed, leaving those too slow to fall to the sides. We rode on through the night. Luis and Carlos lay along-side me. Luis would bump me each time I forgot and rolled onto my back. My breasts shone prominently when I was on my back. He kept pushing me onto my side throughout the night. The heat of the next day had me sweating constantly, but I knew to keep myself hidden.

Luis figured we were well into Mexico by now. Maybe headed to Veracruz. By that evening we had drunk all the water we were carrying. Thirst and food would be something we would need to pay attention to from now on. The motion of the train swaying as it plodded along became a familiar rhythm.

Sometime near midnight the train began to slow down. It didn’t alarm us at first, because we had waited as trains passed from the other direction several times already. Suddenly there were whistles and shouting. The train passed slowly under a metal bridge spanning the tracks. Uniformed men with rifles were standing on it shouting to stand up and place your hands on your head. Spotlights lined the sides of the train. A couple people near us tried to jump down and run away, but that resulted in probably breaking your leg or ankle. The train lurched to a complete stop. People near the ladders stood looking down into a web of flashlight beams.

Slowly a reluctant procession of riders began to climb down. Once on the ground the flashlights blinded everyone. We were led by guards holding rifles. No one doubted the seriousness of the guards. There were two large pens maybe fifty yards ahead. One was already full. The other was just being filled. They were herding us towards it. Carlos and I were at the very end of our group. Farther down the way, I could see white buses were lined up and being filled. Mexicali police were searching each person before they were on to the buses.

They would find the drugs and money! Surely, they would turn us over to the cartel. I walked slowly as we neared the pen. One guard up ahead was shouting directions. I was in complete panic. I won’t go back. I mumbled to myself. I will die first! Just as I approached the last guard on my left I froze. The guard looked at me and shouted, instantly I pulled my hood back revealing my long hair. The line moved on away from me. It was dark around us and his flashlight shown right into my face.

The guard had a look of total shock on his face. I wouldn’t budge. With almost no hesitation I started unbuttoning my shirt. My bra left no doubt in his mind that I was female. I fought back all emotion. I finished unbuttoning my top and reached under my bra and exhaled. With one swift movement I lifted my bra and my breasts sprang free and just hung there.

The guard’s mouth hung open as he stared at me. His partner up ahead shouted and then walked back towards us. His eyes widened as he gazed at my boobs hanging there. He turned around and returned to the pen door. He pushed the last guy in and slapped a padlock on it and came back over to the two of us.

The second guard was somewhat older. He grabbed my shoulder, shoving me towards a small guard shack right next to the pens. The shed was occupied by a third guy who must have been the officer in charge.



He was kicked back in a chair with his feet up on a small desk. He practically fell backwards as the other two guards pushed me in. He began to stand up and I drew up my bra up once again. You would have thought they had never seen breasts before.

I reached under my boobs and lifted them. I pushed them together and upward for the men to see. I kind of bounced them up and down. This caused all three men to gasp. The guy nearest me reached out and started to touch my one breast. I caught his hand and pulled it against my boob and moved his hand around. I stopped only to slide my backpack off. I removed my hoodie and sort of covered the backpack with it. I didn’t want them focusing on it too much.

I turned back around and grabbed the guy’s hand again and led it to my breast. The guy to my left was dumbstruck. I reached for his chin and pulled his head right to my left nipple. The guy started nursing like a baby. Thank God he was gentle, because they were still sore as hell from the other night. The guy behind the desk was awestruck. I looked him square in the eye. His buddy was sucking away now, making grunts as his lips pulled against my nipple.

“Do you want to have the best shift all this month?” I asked him.

“Dios Mio!” he exclaimed.

“Si, Si.”

“Three blow-jobs, Si? For me and my two friends to go free, Si?”

“Si, por favor,” he nodded with no hesitation whatsoever.

I pushed the guy off my boob and removed my shirt. I undid my bra and dd it on top of the back-pack along with my shirt. I turned around and the guy on my right just helps himself to my breast. The guy behind the desk seemed to be the boss so I guessed he wanted to be first. I pointed to his crotch and waved my hand. He needed no further encouragement. His pants dropped and he began digging his cock out. He began jacking at it franticly.

“No, no,” I said, “My job.”

He came around from behind the desk, and I knelt before him and drew his half hard dick into my mouth. I felt like such a whore doing this, but I had made myself a promise to do whatever it would take to see my momma again. I will suck cocks all the way up to the United States if that is what it would take.

I didn’t know for sure if these guys would stand by our bargain, but I saw no other option. I worked that guards cock like my life depended on it. I took it as deeply as was possible and stood up and offered my breasts to suckle at. I dropped down again and worked him for maybe another five minutes. Finally, he grabbed my head and started jerking urgently. Spurts of his cum shot off into my mouth like a hose. He violently thrust at my face until he was totally spent.

The other guard had been standing right along-side of us. I had reached over a couple times already and was using my hand to jack his cock. He jumped at his turn. His jabs poked his cock-head against the back of my throat constantly. He was so urgent that he wanted no part of my breasts. He wouldn’t let go of my head and he just pumped at my face until his orgasm. I swallowed and gulped as he hammered at my throat. I looked up to him and extended my tongue. The white layer of paste in my mouth was from him. I think he was pleased.

The last guy, the youngest was the most timid. I couldn’t help noticing a ring on his finger. He was married. I guess this was not something he did regularly, but he was not going to turn down this opportunity either. I did not know if his wife would do this for him or not, but I was going to be the best he ever got.

I stroked, sucked and took him as deep as my throat would allow. I pushed my breasts together and cradled his cock in my cleavage. I rubbed my breasts against his slippery cock until it burst forth his jet of cum. I rubbed my sore boobs up and down until I had milked every last drop from his wilting cock. I looked up at him and scooped up as much cum as I could find. I used my fingers to poke it into my mouth licking off the remains. I held my tongue out for his approval. His face revealed his satisfaction.

I stood up and faked a confident smile at them. I hated myself for doing this, but I figured I had a better chance if I just assumed they would follow their end of the bargain. I grabbed my bra and quickly put it on. I put my shirt on and got the hoodie over my shoulders. I stood there waiting. So, what would it be? My stomach was churning, and I thought I might throw-up. I was ashamed for what I had just done, but I steeled my emotions and tried to keep it together. The two guards that had brought me in went out side with me. My hands were visibly shaking as we approached the cage. Carlos and Luis had worked their way nearest to the gate.

The moment was at hand. The one young guard drew out a key and opened the padlock. He held the door partially open. I stood-fast expecting the bargain to be honored and to my shock, the guard looked right at me. I pointed to Carlos and Luis and he allowed them out. He slammed and locked the pen door.

“Vi, rapido,” he said pointing to the other end of train-yard.

The three of us ran. We fled the rail-yard area and didn’t stop running until we were out of sight of the very last train. The roads became dark very quickly. Finding our way would be impossible until morning. We came by a small ravine with some tall grasses growing up around it. We decided to stay put for the night in among the thick growth. I was so tired that anything would do at this point. I used my backpack as a pillow and just curled up on the ground.

Carlos was looking at me. I couldn’t see his face and it was too dark to read his expression, but I just felt like it could wait until morning. Luis sat down along-side me. I pulled him by the shirt and snuggled my backsides up against him. Carlos finally sat down, and I pulled him near to me also. I felt safe with their bodies touching me on each side. I didn’t care what they were thinking of me at this point, I just wanted to sleep.

Chapter 5

The morning would come too soon. Noise from the busy road nearby woke us. I was already missing Momma’s cooking and her warm daily greeting. We didn’t talk that much. Luis focused mostly on just how we needed to keep moving. Road side vendors sold foods and drinks along most major through-ways. We had to walk some but finally found a stand selling food. Water was the most awesome thing. I had taken it for granted back home. Here on the road you drank when you had the chance.

Luis was trying to figure out the best way to continue. He was told by the vendor that we were about three-hundred km from Veracruz. Carlos had been giving me the silent treatment all morning. While Luis was talking to the street vendor, I figured Carlos and I needed to talk.

“Por favor, hermano.”

I told Carlos that I loved him. I truly wanted only good things for us in the future. But we had to have a future for that to happen.

“You saw the Mexicali Police, didn’t you?” I asked. “Did you not think they would find the drugs and the money? We would all be sitting in jail right now waiting for the cartel to pick us up. Maybe by now they would have been us, and we would soon all be dead.”

“Hermano, brother, I love you, but don’t judge me. I will do whatever needs to be done to see Momma again.”

“We will get through this,” I said pleading with him.

Carlos didn’t respond so I gave him a hug. He gave a half-hearted embrace in return. I knew he was ashamed of me, but I couldn’t see any other way.

Luis had learned that there was a refueling center not too far up the road. The vendor had suggested the best route into the city was by hitching a ride on a truck. He also warned against being seen walking along the road. Authorities didn’t like seeing too many vagrants on the roads heading into the city. They had enough problems. More homeless people heading into the city was just more trouble. Police would prefer seeing people leaving the city. Those people they left alone. You became someone else’s problem then. We thanked the man and headed up the road.



When we arrived at the truck stop it was near noon. It was a large travel center. The lot was full of over-the-road trucks all idling as the drivers were inside eating lunch. Our plan was to try to talk some driver into giving us a lift to Veracruz. Very few of the trucks were occupied and if they were, the drivers turned Luis down flat. The risk was too great. Trucks were always in danger of getting hi-jacked by thieves looking to steal the cargo. No driver would risk it.

After a dozen or so refusals we left the lot to go inside. At the very least we could eat lunch. The bar was lined with guys all eating the noon meal. We sat at a table and ordered some food. For now, we seemed stuck on how to get a ride. Carlos kept insisting we should just use some of the money we had brought along with us and offer to pay for a ride. Luis over-ruled this as very dangerous. Yes, we were literally carrying thousands of the cartel’s money, but there were many others hanging around the bar area who looked rather rough. Any display of cash money would attract the would-be robbers among them. They would figure we were carrying more money. We needed to look and act poor. Only begging would reinforce the idea that we didn’t have anything worth stealing.



Luis had learned much from his father. He had a thinking man’s head also. Carlos meant well, but was just plain clueless as to these things. We finished our meal and were trying to figure out our next move.

Two men over near the bar had caught my eye during lunch. They were both wearing matching company logo shirts. They had their backs to us now, but I noticed when we came in the one turned to look in my direction.

“Wait here for me here,” I said.

I left my jacket and backpack with Luis and headed into the girl’s restroom. Inside I tried my best to make myself attractive or at least clean. I scrubbed my face and pulled my hair back. I couldn’t waste time with make-up, but I felt maybe my youth would suffice. Instead of returning to our table, I walked towards the bar area. There was a seat open next to the two men I had been watching. They both noticed me right away. I sat and smiled. I began a polite conversation with the guy nearest me. His buddy was still eating, but had eyes all over me. As I made small talk, I could see his friend’s roving eyes checking out my body. I constantly flashed a friendly smile in his direction too.

I told them I was desperate for a ride for myself and two friends up to Veracruz. They both shook their heads saying it would be against company policy for anyone to be with them in the truck. They were headed that direction but could not be of help. I really turned on the charm, I knew rules were rules, but would they make an exception?

The rear of the travel center was set-up for professional drivers. On the way in I had seen a sign advertising a shower area for truck drivers. I had never been in something like that, but it made sense that guys on the road needed a place once in a while to clean up. Over-the-road truckers could not only get a meal, they could shower, shave and they even had a laundry center back there.

These two guys seemed about as normal as a couple drivers could be. And the one had been obviously interested in checking me out. I steered the conversation to the weather and just how warm it had been. I complained to the one guy about how stuffy it was in the bar. I innocently pulled at my shirt, and blew down the open part just under my chin. I seductively asked where a girl could go to get cooled off.

The guy who had been checking me out suggested a cooling shower might do the trick. I guess he thought it was a joke, but I jumped at the offering and was holding him serious. I smiled warmly at him and stared him down. His eyes wouldn’t leave my gaze. Finally, the smirk left his face and he looked down nervously to his food. I seized upon the opening and went for it.

“Would you be willing to buy me a shower?” I asked innocently.

His partner d; he practically spit out his coffee.

In my most flirtatious voice, I asked if he was interested in joining me. They had both laughed at his joke, but now realized I was serious. I complained that I had not had a shower yet today, and how nice it would feel. I was actually very serious about that part. I had all the grime and dirt from our days of traveling on me. I was longing to feel clean again. This was my only hope. Would they go for it?

The guy finished his mouthful of food and asked, “Was I a hooker?”

I was shocked, and very hurt by his comment, but I quickly decided it was best to keep the mood light and not show my true feelings.



“No,” I smiled at him sweetly,” I don’t want your money.”

“But I would really like to take a shower….” I said, my voice trailing off.

“Paulo is my name,” he offered standing up.

He extended his hand. I shook it softly.

His buddy also stood up. “Vicente,” he said.

It was only now that I realized they had company shirts with their names sewn into them. I thought this was so cute, and polite enough to stand for me too. Vicente left money on the counter for their lunch. Paulo and I walked down the hall to the rear of the building. I had never been in this part of a rest stop before. There was a small cashier stand. It sold cigarettes, liquors and other supplies truckers would need. Paulo inquired about the shower rooms and paid for the use of one.

The clerk was a young guy. He took Paulo’s money handed him a key and gave him his change. He pointed to a door just down the hall. I couldn’t help noticing the cashier guy was giving me a once over. He maybe thought we were a couple wanting some private time alone together. I told myself I didn’t care what he was thinking.

Vicente caught up with us as we entered the shower room. Paulo unlocked the door and held it for Vicente and me. I did truly want a shower, and it would feel terrific to get the grime and dirt off me. The little room was adequate for one person, but we all three squeezed into it. It was basic, just a sink, a place to hang your clothing and a surprisingly clean shower complete with towels, soap and shampoo.

I took the key from Paulo and locked the door and innocently leaned back against it. I was trying to hide my hands behind my back for I was shaking so bad I thought they would both notice. I was trying to get a feel for just exactly how to handle this. My nerves were showing, but I pretended to act in control of how this would go. I kept telling myself this is just necessary. I needed something they had, and hopefully I could get it from them. I placed a clean towel on the floor and slipped off my shoes and socks. The two guys seemed to not believe their luck.

“So how would the company feel about me riding in the truck if I was all nice and clean?” I asked with a nervous smile on my face.



I started a slow strip-tease. I placed my hand up to the top button of my top and began to unbutton it ever so slowly. I had to use both hands to still my quivering. I could hear the two men’s breathing actually change pitch as I began to unbutton my shirt. I took as much time as possible and finally slipped my shirt off my shoulders. I stood there in my bra looking at the two of them. My bra was actually dirty, but I don’t think either one of them noticed. Both men just seemed awestruck. I reached in for the shower control and turned the water flow on.

“Well do you want to join me?” I asked Paulo.

I actually longed to get under the shower, but first things first. I looked at Paulo and pushed right up to him. I placed my chest right up against his. Reaching back, I unclasped my bra. He held the sides of the bra as I backed away. His jaw dropped noticeably as the full-frontal view of my breasts was revealed. I asked him if he liked what he saw. No words came out his mouth. The steam from the shower was beginning to fill the room.

“Look guys, we’re wasting water,” I said.

“The deal is this,” I said, “I will fuck one of you right now, and the other one when we get to Veracruz. Deal?”

“Hell yes!” stammered Paulo.



“Okay then. Who will be first?

“Me now!” Paulo snapped, not even giving Vicente the chance to speak.

I unbuttoned my fly and wiggled out of my jeans. I deliberately placed my hand on Vicente’s shoulder to steady myself. Vicente emitted an audible gasp as he gazed on my now near-naked body. I dropped my panties and I climbed into the warm shower. I immediately stuck my head into the steaming water. I closed my eyes and focused on the sensation of the cascading water rolling off my face.

By the time I had lathered up my hair Paulo had stripped and climbed in with me. He pulled the curtain closed and placed his hands on my hips. I wanted Vicente to witness this as an incentive to follow through on their end of the deal. I wanted him to see what he would have coming at the other end of our trip so I pushed opened the curtains again and asked to leave it that way. Paulo was standing between my spread legs. The warm water rolling off my body was being shed right onto him. The feeling of clean water running down my body was amazing.



I leaned forward, jutting my boobs out towards Paulo. I cupped both breasts and lifted both, offering them to him. He bent forward and kissed each one gently and then buried his face into the soft wet mounds. The marks from the gang’s were now just pink blotches. I looked out at Vicente; his mouth was hanging open. I offered my wet arm out of the shower to him. He brought my hand to his mouth and started sucking on my wet fingers. Paulo was now nursing at my breasts like a baby.

I could feel Paulo’s cock brushing against my cunt. I knew he was rock hard. I pushed him back some and soaped him up. He just stood back admiring me. I reached down and used the soap to lather up his cock. I washed it gently stroking him ever so slowly. I gazed up at him and as soon as the soap left his cock I squatted down and took him into my mouth. He immediate held my head still and began jacking against me. I pulled his cock out of my mouth and started licking away at his balls until I thought he might just go off from that alone.

I stood up and leaned back against the shower wall and thrust my hips towards him spreading my legs. He gripped my hips and squared himself to me. The soap suds were washing down my belly and rinsing his cock. I used a finger to rub and loosen my slit for him. With a firm grip on my hips he steered his cock right into me. I leaned back on the shower wall for support. I placed both hands on his hips, and helped guide him in.

I had never fucked standing up before. He pushed solidly until he was deep inside of me. I had to really lean back in order for him to be able to thrust. As I did, he started grunting. Then he picked up speed and began thrusting with greater urgency. I tried to kiss him on the mouth a couple times, but he couldn’t hold his breath long enough. All his energy was into thrusting as rapidly as possible.

I flattened my shoulders against the wall and used my hands on his hips to control his thrusts. I turned my head to Vicente and looked him right in the eye. I puckered my lips and blew him an imaginary kiss. I didn’t like acting like such a tramp, but I really needed to know that I could count on his desire for me. His expression was very real. He was so turned on just watching me getting fucked by his partner. He had a hand over his crotch and was rubbing himself.

“Don’t do that now,” I said wickedly, “Save yourself for me later.”

Paulo was almost lifting me off the shower floor at this point. I placed my hands on his shoulders and just hung on. His urgent groans let us all know that he was cumming. He banged his hips against mine and shook. I was so enjoying the warm water pouring down my body that I don’t think I even felt his cum. He shuddered a last couple jolts and buried his face in between my boobs. While he did this, I blew another kiss over to Vicente.



The warm water had refreshed my spirit. I felt clean again. Paulo and I toweled off and the three of us all left the shower room together. Several other drivers stared at us as we all exited the little room. As we walked back through the eating area, I spotted Carlos and Luis. I gave them a wave-on. They immediately jumped to their feet. As they approached me I said, “We are on our way to Veracruz.”

Chapter 6

I thought it best not to do too much in the way of introductions. It must have been Paulo’s turn to drive. He had us rolling down the road in just a few minutes. Carlos and Luis squeezed into a little space behind the seat. I sort of shared the passenger seat with Vicente. I don’t think he minded so much. I didn’t go into exact relationships, but I assured Vicente that neither of the guys was my boyfriend. I didn’t want him feeling uncomfortable with me practically sitting on his lap.

Luis was actually talkative with the guys and me. Carlos was quiet. I think he was sulking again over my method to get us a ride. We would need to have another talk later.



The truck was actually an interesting way to travel. I tried to keep the conversation light. I knew Paulo and Vicente were honest working guys. They were putting their jobs in jeopardy by allowing us to ride with them. Three hundred kilometers passed quickly. The two guys had shared many stories of their years on the road. I actually began to like these two.

It was early evening as we pulled into Veracruz. Paulo and Vicente were really helpful with directions and routes north. Luis learned quite a bit from them. Paulo said that their present run would take them west from Veracruz. There was a major truck stop near where they planned to turn west. We pulled in and parked among other trucks. The truck stop was much nicer than the one where we first met up with them.

Carlos and Luis were going to head into the travel center for food. I had an obligation I needed to fulfill. I told them I would catch up to them later in the center. The truck had one of those little sleeper units towards the back of the cab. It wasn’t roomy, but it would do. I climbed back onto a little sleeping bunk and began peeling off my clothing. Paulo drew a curtain around the front windows and pivoted the passenger seat around. I wasn’t nervous or self-conscious with these two guys. Both had treated us well and this was my payback. I was okay with it.

Vicente stripped and crawled in next to me. He lay down next to me and began caressing my breasts. I was on my back and he gently kneaded the sides of my boobs. I reached out to Paulo, who sat watching from the front seat. I wanted to include him as I had with Vicente earlier that afternoon. He took my hand and we held each other. Vicente was actually a good lover. He was gentle and he cared about what he was doing to me. He massaged my clit with one hand as he nursed at my breasts. In just a little bit he had me moaning. I think he didn’t want to enter me until I had a solid orgasm first. How considerate.

I couldn’t have imagined myself ever be doing something like this with complete strangers. I had to force my emotions and morals aside for now. I focused on Vicente’s fingers. His gentle touch was impossible to resist. I released myself and set aside all that was happening in my life and decided to just enjoy the sensation he was delivering. I shuttered through my first orgasm. I grabbed for his cock. He was as stiff as possible. I encouraged his penetration by drawing my knees up and rubbing my clit with it. He sunk his manhood into me ever so gently. I felt so compete. I tugged at Paulo’s hand at each peak of emotion.



Vicente was gently rocking his hips against mine. I knew he had learned how to treat a woman. His pleasure was enhanced by mine. He wanted me to enjoy the sensations and I guess this in turn heighten his enjoyment. I didn’t want to distract Vicente, but I motioned for Paulo to pull out his cock. I wanted to feel both at the same time. Paulo stood up and unfastened his belt and loosened the front of his pants.

His enjoyment of watching me getting fucked by his buddy was obvious. His hard-on bounced around as he tried to position himself close enough to me. I scooted on my shoulders and got my mouth within range of him. Vicente might have been a little out of sorts, because up until then he had been kissing me gently about my face. But, he didn’t say anything. He just moved his kisses to my breasts and belly.

I held out my tongue and Paulo set his cock square in the middle of it. He didn’t thrust. He just let me draw it into my mouth and suck on it as I wished. He used his hand to stroke at his cock and would then gently bat it against my tongue. I soon got the idea that he was just wanting to cum in my mouth. I went and gave him a warm target. It wasn’t long before he increased his intensity and I knew he was close to cumming. I got my mouth as close as possible and sure enough he began to jerk his hips.



Three or four spurts of cum gently landed on my outstretched tongue. The warm salty flavor instantly rolled into my mouth. I swallowed each deposit as it came. I tried to control my gulps because I was still sort of on my back. One swallow went down wrong. My gag reflex was instantaneous. I coughed and convulsed as I tried to force it out. I hadn’t even considered Vicente who was still thrusting at me. He was just about to climax.



My muscle contractions caused my cunt to spasm on Vicente’s cock. It must have felt amazing to him. He roared out and began unloading in me. He jerked at my waist almost violently as his orgasm continued. I struggled for air. I continued to curl, tighten and tried to cough out the obstruction in my windpipe. We went on like this until each of us was exhausted.

The absurdity of it all was too much. I couldn’t help but break out in the most laughter I had in weeks. Paulo and Vicente followed as soon as they could catch their breaths. We all belly-laughed so long, that it hurt my sides. Paulo offered me a bottle of water as I climbed out of the cab. I raised it towards them in a gesture of good-bye.

I headed into the travel center to locate Carlos and Luis. I did not want to spend another night sleeping on a roadside somewhere. I told Luis we needed to get a hotel room. We had the money and I wanted a bath and a clean bed tonight. Luis agreed. I ordered some food and afterwards we headed towards some hotels nearby. I knew they all wouldn’t be, but this had been a good day.

Chapter 7

The next morning was a fresh start. We were able to launder some clothes and get some much-needed items. We had the money. We just needed to be careful when and how we spent it. After a good breakfast we felt our best way out of the city would be to purchase bus tickets.



The day was off to a beautiful start, but it wasn’t to last very long. Next to the bus station was a news stand. Local papers, magazines and national news publications were for sale. I think Luis noticed it first, but as we passed it, we all paused. One of the national paper’s headlines in bold print headlined, “Slaughter in San Paulo Sula.” I saw the bold print and it read something about “-shed in the streets.” There were pictures below. I felt as if the air was being sucked out of my lungs. I turned my head. I didn’t want to know. I didn’t want to look or know the details. My hands began to tremble.

Uncle Enrico’s predictions echoed in my ears. My body seemed to just go numb. Feelings of dread sickened me. I couldn’t put aside the realization that all of that might just be because of me. I suddenly felt like I needed to sit down. Just outside the doors of the bus depot were some wooden benches and I started to sit. Luis grabbed me and pulled me up.

“Not here, not now,” he said.

Luis was very nervous about hanging around a public transportation facility. We just walked away. Maybe a block or two later we stopped and huddled near a small alley way. Luis was suddenly very worried about us being seen together. Public buildings had security cameras. There was no way to know just who would have access to those. We decided it would be best to separately purchase our bus tickets and even sit apart. The three of us traveling together on public transport might alert cartel snitches.

I wasn’t sure if Luis was being paranoid or not, but his instincts had saved us more than a few times already. Tampico was 467km north. It would be a full day’s ride on the bus, and I was looking forward to a less stressful day.

Luis left to go get his bus ticket and let us know about the departure time. This gave Carlos and I time to talk. We sat on a nearby park bench and I hugged him. I knew what Carlos was thinking. I wasn’t sure if I should be mad or embarrassed. My slutty behavior was not normal for me.

“This wasn’t easy for me,” I told Carlos.

I know he felt like I had become a whore. I wasn’t sure how to make him understand.

“I am responsible for all this,” I said.

I had foolishly thought I could handle the gang.

“Damnit, I am paying the price for my stupidity,” I said.

“I wasn’t going to let our fate be at the hands of those wishing to us,” I said.

I tried to sound like Uncle Enrico. “We will all get through this.”

I swore that I would do this as many times as necessary to survive and make things right for us again.

“This is all that I can offer,” I pleaded.

Carlos just stared at the ground not saying anything. A short while later Luis returned, and Carlos and I took our individual turns. We had almost three hours to wait until the bus departed. Once again, we seemed to get lucky as one more step of our journey would soon be behind us.

The wait time allowed us to seek out a local library. Public access is allowed under certain conditions to the internet. We checked into the media site we had agreed on and found no messages from our parents. I found this a little worrisome, but Carlos and Luis both felt it was still too soon to be concerned about this. We left a short message as to our progress and assured them that things were okay with us.



The bus ride was uneventful, and we did sit apart just to blend in better. We arrived that evening in Tampico. Carlos and I were feeling tired and wanted to tap into some more of the gang’s money we were carrying. Luis was very reluctant to do this and preferred to stay in the poorer area of town and act broke. Carlos and I were just as insistent that we had the money and we should enjoy some of it. Against Luis’s better judgement and I think, just to please me, we took a local cab to one of the city’s finer hotels.



I was awed by the lobby. It was something I had only seen in magazines. We paid upfront for a night’s stay and headed towards the elevators up to our room. Even the elevator ride was a new experience for all of us. We located our room on the fifth floor. We were all astounded by the luxury amenities. Luis was still pouting and kept on about being noticed. He worried the cartel would be expecting us to foolishly be living it up on their money.

I threw my arms around his neck and hugged him. I kissed him gently on the cheek and rubbed my nose against his face playfully trying to bring out his normal spirit. He finally cracked a smile as I flung myself, arms wide-open on one of the soft beds. Looking down at me he couldn’t help but grin as I wiggled into the gloriously soft bed cover.

We decided to order food delivered to the room. This is something I would have never thought in my wildest dreams of doing. Luis was okay with this. He preferred we not be seen too much anyway. We enjoyed the most wonderful food. It was a feast fit for a king. We stuffed ourselves until we couldn’t eat another bite.

A little while later, Luis felt he should go out and scout out the next step of our journey. He certainly didn’t want to approach anyone at the hotel. We had passed several working-class type bar areas on our cab trip here. He felt he could mix in and find out if others were heading our direction and how. Luis was still insistent about laying low and not being conspicuous. He stashed his back pack under the one bed and only took enough money to buy information if necessary.

Chapter 8

There is something about having a full stomach. I guess Carlos and I were just anxious about our future. Yes, there were going to be difficulties ahead, but for now we were feeling invincible. We sat around for a while staring out from the balcony. The property of the hotel was grand. Despite Luis’s warning, Carlos and I longed to see just how the rich and famous enjoyed their lives. We figured if we didn’t leave the property we would be fine. We left the room and rode the elevator down to the main lobby. We felt out of place walking around there, but the staff seemed to generally accept us.

There were several uniformed security staff now standing near the outer doors. Our room card allowed us into the walled areas of the property. Carlos and I marveled at the beauty of the landscape behind the protection of the gates. Fragrant flowering trees were spread about. Cascading fountains fed flowing water into beautifully designed pools. Native birds chirped and called from the tree tops.

Once inside the gated area all the staff seemed to greet us warmly. I could get used to living like this very easily. Carlos and I even splurged and enjoyed a drink at the bar near the pool. Life’s problems seemed distant. I sort-of felt like we deserved this treat. I hated to leave this paradise but there were still obstacles ahead and we didn’t want Luis coming back and finding the room empty.

Our room was amazing. The bathroom was larger than any I had ever imagined anyone could ever need. I left Carlos watching the television and planned to spend the rest of the evening soaking in the giant-sized tub. The swirling water of the Jacuzzi drowned out all other distractions. I practically cooked myself in the steaming water. I was beginning to feel weak and any soreness of my muscles was now only a memory. I wrapped a towel around myself and wrapped my hair in another. The cool air of the room struck me as I exited the bathroom.

A cold hand grabbed me by the shoulder. I spun around to stare into the face of an ugly, fat man with a gun pointing right into my face. Instantly I saw Carlos over by the balcony door. His wrists were shackled to the railing. It was one of the security guards that we had seen downstairs.

“You are Maria, yes?” he kept repeating.

He was almost jabbing the gun in my face. He jerked at my shoulder shaking me and trying to force out an admission. I looked over to the one bed and saw both of our backpacks were lying on top hanging open. Several of the bricks of heroin lay scattered on the bed-cover beside them.

“You are her,” he said again.

My instinct was to scream, but then I realized that this guy was somehow connected to the cartel. He was probably just a local hotel security guard and probably had never drawn his gun before now. By the way he was shaking it and waving it in my face I thought he was as scared as I was. My hands clung to the towel wrapped around my chest. I was concerned for Carlos. He didn’t seem to be ing or anything. I guessed the guy had caught him off-guard and surprised him. He was hand-cuffed to the top rail of the balcony. He sat helplessly with his hands pulled over his head.

The guard was extremely nervous. He started trying to pushing me down to the floor. I tried to sit as he pressed down on my shoulder. The towel was just barely covering my bottom. I tried to lean somewhat to keep my hips covered. I looked up to the guy. He was a fat ugly pig. His belly hung over his belt. It shook as he constantly waved the gun back and forth between Carlos and me.

Our failure to listen to Luis had caused us big trouble. Obviously the cartel did have spies out watching for us. This dumb-ass had spotted us, and I guess he saw a large payday if he turned us over to the cartel. There was not much use in denying anything. He had proof of the drugs lying right out on the bed. My body began to tremble almost uncontrollably. The thought of being handed over to the people who would likely end our lives was overwhelming.

I had to stall was all I could think of. I couldn’t let him take us from that room. I didn’t know if he had thought this all through. How was he going to lead Carlos and me out of the hotel? What if Luis comes back? Did he have enough restraints to manage all three of us? How would he get us through the lobby and get us out to a car? Would he call for help or turn us over to cartel members’ right there at the room? God help us, maybe he had called them already.



It dawned on me that he assumed there were just the two of us. Luis’s back-pack was likely still hidden under the bed. Our only hope lie in Luis coming back and somehow saving us. I knew we were doomed once we left this room or the hotel. I wasn’t sure if the guy would even try to take both of us at the same time. Would he Carlos and just turn me in for the reward? I had to stall somehow.

The ugly son of a bitch was probably in his forties and didn’t seem all that professional. I think he might have gotten a general heads-up from cartel leaders to be on the watch for us. Damn, I think he just stumbled onto us with a lucky guess. Carlos was trapped and could be of no help. Shouting out would only bring more unwanted attention to our room.

I have never told Luis or Carlos this, but at that moment I was considering just jumping off the balcony. I would rather die at my own hand rather than have the cartel me to death. The only thing that stopped me then was leaving my brother chained to that rail. I couldn’t just abandon him that way. But I quickly made up my mind that I was not leaving that room. I knew we would both die if we did.



The pig was giving me the most attention. I had no choice. I had to think of something. I loosened the grip I had on the towel at my chest. I let it slip from my armpits and dropped to my lap. I let the towel wrapped around my head fall away dropping behind me. My damp hair fell and clung to my face. I just sat there naked to the waist.

The guard’s eyes immediately focused on the sight of my breasts. I was leaning to one side wishing to crawl to Carlos. The guy was still shaking the gun. I really didn’t think he was just going to shoot me right there.

He was standing right above me. I could sense his nervousness. He never took his eyes off me now. I sat up straight and crawled to where Carlos was restrained. As I left my spot on the floor, I left the towels lying there. I knew my butt would attract all of his attention now. He didn’t like seeing me move without his order, but I needed to be by Carlos. I think my nakedness just left the guard speechless.

I scooted over next to Carlos and leaned up against him. I buried my head into his chest and began sobbing. I was truly terrified and thought this would be the end of both of us. I remember staring at the balcony. I again thought if I just jumped off it this would all be over. Momma, Enrico and Luis’s faces flashed before me. I just wouldn’t let them down. The guard guy seemed to be okay with us huddled together. He could now keep Carlos in his sight and also satisfy his fixation on staring at me. My mind was racing. I needed to come up with some plan or something. Even if Luis came back now how would he defeat the gun-waving dumb-shit right in front of us? Stall, stall, was all I could think. Time was all we had. What else could I do?



Okay, I will admit this is the sickest thing imaginable. I know that I will surely suffer in Hell for this despicable act, but I could not see any other thing else to do. I am so ashamed. I was never going to ever speak of this again. I was truly willing to die instead of doing this, but I would not leave my brother Carlos to die at the hands of the cartel alone. I reached for Carlos belt and began to unfasten it. Carlos looked shocked. He struggled to push me away. I managed to grab his zipper and tugged it down.

The guard was as shocked as Carlos. I fought for control of my brother’s belt and undid it. I pulled his jeans open in front and buried my face into his underwear. I stuck out my tongue and began licking at the fabric of his underwear. With my ass up and my head down the guard was getting a clear view of everything.Carlos struggled and cursed at me. I wouldn’t relent. Keeping my mouth against him, I and continued to try to arouse him. The guard had no issue with this. I wasn’t even sure if he knew Carlos was my brother. He didn’t care. I guess he figured the cartel would us anyway. What would be the harm in watching a girl give her boyfriend one last blow-job? Time, time was all I could think. We just needed more time.

I finally got really upset with Carlos fighting me. I straightened up and squatted. I roughly jerked his pants open. His shriveled-up cock was nestled in his pubic hair. I had to hurt him to allow me access to it. I’m sure I drug it along his zipper some, but I continued to fight him for control of it. Finally, I got his pants down far enough to give me room to get my mouth on him.

I licked and probed with my tongue trying to get some reaction. I guess the guard was thinking we were boyfriend-girlfriend and that I wanted one last taste of cock before I would be ed. It seemed to be working. The guard had sat down on the edge of the bed and watched me struggling for control of Carlos’ cock. He never said a word. It seemed to take forever, but finally Carlos started to react. His cock stiffened and lengthened somewhat. I never looked up at Carlos. I couldn’t have. I could have never borne the look on his face.



Carlos jerked his hips at me again and again trying to push my mouth away. Finally, I had enough. I sat up squarely and then slapped him hard across his face. He seemed stunned. I got back down and continued pulling his cock into my mouth. Somehow from then on, he seemed resigned to allowing me to continue. I didn’t care if he understood or not. I did not want to die!

I eventually had him hard. I was popping his cock in and out from between my lips. The guard was staring at me the whole time this was going on. I could tell that he was getting turned-on. He never blinked or uttered another thing. Finally, I sat upright and turned with my pussy towards the guard. I lay back with my legs open and my knees in the air. My butt was flattened out on the cool tile floor. I rested my head in Carlos’ lap and continued to pull and stretch at his cock.

I put my hand between my legs, and I started to massaging my clit. The guard was so fascinated that he finally lowered his gun. His hand slumped to his side. After just a couple minutes I could sense he was becoming horny. He began by rubbing his own crotch and then finally just had to open his own trousers to free his cock. The perverted bastard started stroking his cock right there in front of us. This whole time Carlos continued to grow harder.

I don’t know exactly what I did to set Carlos off, because I thought I was hurting him more than anything else, but he suddenly groaned and had a cum. The spurts of jizz lept from his cock and splattered against my cheek and neck. His grunts continued, while he was banging his hips against my head until he finally seemed through.

The guard seemed thrilled at this. I was still fingering my clit rapidly and now patted my belly. My cunt was red by now. The guard was completely beside himself. I spread my knees open and thrust my hips up and towards him. He couldn’t resist the invitation and suddenly got up off the bed and began removing his pants. He looked ridiculous standing there with his belly hanging over his cock. His uniform shirt luckily covered the most disgusting parts of him. The dumb-shit left his gun lying on the bed, got down, and crawled over to me. I was now flat on my back and I guess he figured he would just flop his fat gut on me and have a fuck.



The pig climbed on top me and almost squished all the air out of my chest. It was hard to feel if he had even gotten his cock into me. He fell on me and started rocking. He was letting out short little grunts as he tried to locate the right spot. I was trying to look away from his face as it made me sick to think that this is how low I had sunk.

Just then some small scrap of luck smiled on me in this most terrible moment. Over the guard’s shoulder, I could just see Luis entering our room. He was quietly advancing on the guard’s gun still lying on the bed. I made no movement to give him away. Luis picked up the gun and quietly came along-side of us. He placed the gun’s barrel against the guard’s head. The guard froze in mid-thrust. I burst into tears. I struggled and pushed the ugly bastard off me and curled up in a ball. I lay there on the floor sobbing.

Luis snapped me out of it by yelling at me to get the keys. Carlos was still attached to the balcony rail. I needed to get him free. I got up and went to the bed and fumbled through the guards pants. I found the right key on the guard’s belt and released Carlos. Carlos and I then put the guard in the same spot Carlos had been. Only now, could I stumble to the bed and fall on it. I curled up and cried uncontrollably.

Soon, I felt someone place a blanket over me. I looked up. It was Carlos. He stooped down over me and gently kissed me on the forehead. I put my hand out and he gave me a gentle squeeze. I stayed there sobbing.

In just a little bit Luis touched me. We had to go he said. We didn’t know if the guard had called someone already. We could not take the chance. The cartel could even be on the way right now. We had to leave immediately.

We left the guard handcuffed to the balcony rail. Luis and Carlos stripped him completely and threw all his clothes off the balcony. We kept his gun, belt and cell phone. As we left, Luis warned the guard that the cartel would likely him for allowing us to escape. He might want to consider changing his story. It might be best for him to deny having ever seen us. We threw the guard’s keys and phone into a sewer a few blocks away. Luis and Carlos differed on whether to keep the gun or not. Luis didn’t want to, but Carlos argued that we might have to defend ourselves. Luis’s common sense finally convinced Carlos that nothing good would come of us having a gun. We headed on our way without it. Luis insisted that we get as far away from that hotel as we could.

Chapter 9

The luxury of a night spent in a fancy hotel was gone. I had done something despicable with my very own brother. I couldn’t believe he would ever forgive me for having committed with him. I could only hope he would never speak of my behavior to anyone. I didn’t know if Luis had even figured out how the guard came to be in our room, or what had actually happened.

My mood was of utter shame. I hadn’t even looked Carlos in the face since. Thank God it was so dark along the roads. It was very late and we found ourselves in an area with very few buildings. No lights were in sight, and we stumbled constantly. Luis finally felt we had gone far enough, and allowed us to crawl into a thicket of trees and rest until morning.

I woke several times throughout the night startled by either a sound, or the visions of the ugly guard pressing down on me. Even in my nightmare, though I wouldn’t allow myself to replay what I had done to my brother.The dawn came much too early. I hadn’t slept much. Luis didn’t exactly go into much about what had happened last night, and Carlos and I didn’t want to go into any details either.

Luis had been successful in finding out about a way north and possibly even a way around the U.S. border. He had paid a man a hundred dollars for the name of a contact in El Galaneno. The guy said he knew of this man who would smuggle people across the border by boat. He would take paying customers to Corpus Christi in Texas, USA. He was a relative of his, and he told Luis the guy was reliable.

El Galaneno was several days travel northward. Luis was unwilling to go near any transportation center for fear that the cartel would be waiting. We were able to make it in four days by hitching rides on farm trucks heading north. A large portion of it we even walked.

We found the information Luis had been given to be truthful. Sure enough, a man at the address said he had a boat. He was willing to take us north of the border, but he wanted a thousand dollars from each of us for it. I wondered if he was just bluffing to see just how much money we had. That was a huge amount and normal migrants would never be able to afford that. I thought maybe he would barter with us, but he seemed to be insistent on the price, and genuinely didn’t care if we just walked away.

Luis, Carlos and I had a serious discussion outside the man’s house. Luis finally decided we would pay the money, but that we would have to come back later with only a portion of it. Luis was afraid that if the man thought we had it on us now we might just get robbed and be out the money and the passage.

The boat owner was a huge man. He had scars all over him. There was a particularly nasty gash across his left cheek. He was a brute. He had obviously been in many vicious fights in his lifetime. He looked like he could just rip a man’s arms right out of their body. Tattoos covered his massive arms. His hair looked like it hadn’t been cut in years. His whole demeanor was that of someone who just took what he wanted. I don’t think he uttered a kind word in our presence. I tried not to make eye contact with him the whole time we were on the porch.

We were to return the following evening around nine pm. We spent an anxious day wondering if we were being set up, or being ripped off. The following evening we arrived just before nine. There were others there waiting also. I guess we just assumed we would be alone, but four rather serious men were standing around waiting too. We were taken by open truck down a rough back-road for miles. There were no signs of houses along this route. Soon, you could sense that we were nearing water.

We arrived at a small shack. There was a dock out back and the property seemed to sit right on the waters-edge. The place was a total mess. The house looked like no one had cared for it in a very long time. There were a couple mean dogs barking out in front. They challenged anyone approaching the property.

The boat was tied to a small dock behind the shack and its engine and lights were already on when we arrived. It was fishing type vessel. The sides were lined with long vertical racks that once held deep-sea fishing gear, but now they seemed to just hold rust. There was a large open section in the rear. It was old, but looked to be a functional boat. We weren’t given a tour or anything, but you could see at least a couple cabin rooms inside towards the front.

Three of four men going with us were carrying large duffel bags that never left their grip. They made me nervous at first, but in another way this all seemed very professional. If they were carrying illegal stuff to the U.S. they seemed more concerned about it than messing with anyone else. I guessed this trip was a legitimate thing other-wise, why would they be here also.



Shortly after we boarded I was shocked to see a girl with one of the crewmen. She was maybe about my age, but very rough looking. She stayed near the one crewman and I guessed her to be his girlfriend. She wasn’t much to look at and cursed constantly whenever she spoke. I counted the captain, the two crewmen and the girl in all making the trip.

The four men sat right next to each other and opposite from us in the boat. They had never said a word since we first saw them.The captain seemed to be attending to some issues near the shack. Finally he came on board and ordered his crew to cast-off. We motored slowly with very few lights on through a dense backwater area full of lagoons and stagnant pools.Eventually we rounded a point and the warm gulf breezes blew away the foul diesel fumes. As we headed out into the gulf waters, I sat looking back thinking to myself, this might be the last time I would ever see my homeland.



The captain put the controls into an auto mode, and then fixed the wheel. He left the controls and only really spoke to all of us for the first time. He said we would go out maybe ten miles and would have to wait for a call from a friend. This person who worked within the U.S. Coast Guard would flag our vessel as having been cleared to return to shore in the US. The captain said he could not enter US waters until he gets the signal from his accomplice. He wasn’t certain exactly when his friend would be able to signal, so we would just have to wait.

He hollered for the girl to keep watch at the wheel then left to go down inside the cabins below. The girl seemed familiar and competent to handle the boat. She was constantly eyeing her cell phone though, and seemed more interested in it than anything else.

In just a little bit one of the crewmen came out and asked Luis to come down below to see the captain. This was something we were unsure of, but what would we have done about it. Luis was gone maybe ten minutes and the same guy came back and said Luis wanted to talk to Carlos. I started to go with him, but the crewman said the rooms were very small and Carlos would be right back.

“Everything is okay, not to worry, the captain just wants to know where exactly you would like to get dropped off,” he said.



I felt nervous now as all of the attention of the other four men was just on me. It was just a few minutes later and the guy comes back again and says they need me too. I was lead down to the cabin and relieved at first to see both Luis and Carlos sitting on a small couch in the captain’s quarters. Both were sitting straight up at attention. I figured maybe they were discussing options. As I entered the small room the crewman moved in behind me. I noticed his movement and turned quickly to see him now with a gun pointed right at me. My stomach dropped. I knew instantly this was a nightmare unfolding. I was pushed to the couch and sat down along-side Carlos and Luis. The captain was sitting by a small desk grinning like a wild creature. He too held a small pistol partially hidden along his leg.

“And so, you are the famous Maria huh,” he laughed.

My skin temperature must have dropped five degrees as a terrifying chill swept over me. “He knew!”

He pointed at my backpack and the crewman ripped it from my hands. He began rummaging through it and quickly found the five packages of heroin I was carrying. He dumped the rest of my things out on the floor. He had no trouble finding the stack of money I had hidden in between my underwear.The captain ordered the crewman to tie each of our hands. He wasn’t gentle. The guy lashed my wrists so tight I thought I would pass-out.

“It looks like I need to make a call to a friend,” the captain laughed.

Take them next-door he said. The crewman grabbed each of us and shoved Carlos and Luis out the door.

“Not her just yet, I will need proof.”

I guessed maybe a picture of me taken by an old girlfriend had been posted offering money for my capture. The captain began dialing out a number and waited for someone to answer. While he was waiting, he started stacking the dope into stacks on a little table right in front of me. He picked up one of the packages waved it and smiled.

“Sinaloa will pay a great amount for this, and for you,” he said.

Just as he was connected he picked up all our money and placed it into the top drawer of a cabinet. He asked for a man named Miguel. Eventually he was speaking to this guy and told him that he had someone that would be of great interest to him. He tapped a couple keys on his phone and held the phone out facing my direction. I could see a grubby looking man in the screen. My face was clearly visible on his screen. The captain panned down to the drugs stacked on the table.

The captain was offering to deliver me either to people in Corpus Christi or bring me back to El Galaneno. The man on the phone said he would have someone he trusted in Corpus Christi to meet him within hours. There was no further small talk. I didn’t get the impression they were really friends. I think maybe the captain was just happy to take advantage of the guy on the other end, and get some money out of him. They agreed on a place to meet and the call ended.

I was sitting there, my hands growing numb. I was hostage, just feet from the scummiest person I think I had ever seen. His breath reeked of rot. His teeth were all blackened or missing and his skin looked like that of a wild pig. His body odor suggested he hadn’t bathed in weeks. He leaned over to a small cabinet and drew out a liquor bottle, unscrewed the top and took a gulp. He grinned and held it out to me.

“You might want some of this, for when the cartel gets you.”

He took another long gulp.

“Oh robre nina,” he said shaking his head.

“They will have a hundred men or more, stoked on “Viagra” waiting for you. You will never survive it.”

“My poor little flower,” he said with a devilish grin.

“But, perhaps I can help you,” he laughed.

There was not enough fresh air in the room to breathe. His foul odor and sheer nastiness was just overpowering. He took another gulp of the liquor and stood up. He was a big man, big as anyone I had ever seen. I cringed on the little couch feeling the life draining from my body. He stood right in front of me and started to unfasten his pants.

“You will need my help to lessen your pain.”

“I will stretch you out,” he laughed.

His grimy trousers dropped, and before my eyes, was the most enormous cock I would have believed possible. The man’s cock was not human. It belonged on a farm animal. There was no way a normal woman could fit something that size into her. There wouldn’t be anyway to have sex with something like that. It would be like going through birth for the woman. It would destroy any woman’s insides just trying to ride something like that. He reached for me and ripped open the front of my shirt. Buttons flew everywhere. He grabbed at my bra breaking the straps, and flung it in pieces against the wall.



“Dios mio,” he uttered, staring at my naked breasts.

I was trying to cover myself, but he kept knocking my arms down.

He began stroking that enormous cock like a man possessed. “El diablo,” I thought. Surely the devil had done this to him. It would be the scourge of all women to have a beast like this walking the earth. Any woman he violated would never walk right again. The monster’s slimy cock-head was already leaking fluid. It was like some evil serpent oozing a foul venom and searching for a victim. All emotion was leaving my body with each breath.

He grabbed me at the waist and torn open my jeans and jerked them downward. He practically lifted me off the ground doing this. There was no struggling against someone his size. His filthy cock touched my body and was pressed up against my stomach. I couldn’t utter a sound. I was just shutting down all my senses. I prayed for a feint. At least then, the bastard would be denied my conscious resistance.

He tossed me down. I fell helplessly on the couch. He hunched over me and started trying to mount me. The force was unbelievable. There was no stopping him and no way to accept his size. As my body was being stretched my spirit reached deeply into some inner strength that I didn’t know I had left. I let out with the loudest scream I had ever thought I was capable of, and I continued screaming. I hurt not only his ears, but mine as well. I screamed again and again as he began his way into me.

He mashed his huge hand down across my face. He was trying to silence my screams, but I managed to get my mouth open just enough for a part of his hand to get between my teeth. I bit down as hard as I could. The taste of filled my mouth. He ripped his hand away leaving a chunk behind in my teeth. He bellowed like a wounded animal.

I would not accept this. I had been through enough, and I wouldn’t take this anymore. I will die first. He started rearing back with his other hand to smash my face in.

Just then I became aware of something going on just outside the door. The captain however, was now in full rage with his hand raised. He was building up a blow which would likely me. Suddenly the door burst open and one of the men that were traveling with us was standing there. He had a gun drawn and aimed right at the captain. Nothing was said; just “BANG” the gun went off instantly. The shot went right thru the captain’s head. Parts of his head left his body and splattered down on me. and tissue sprayed across my bare chest. My mouth and lips were already covered with from his hand.

Just then another shot rang out and the man in the doorway holding the gun was thrown forward against the door-frame. poured from his nose. He slumped lifelessly to the floor.

The captain’s twitching body rolled off me. The ringing in my ears was over whelming. The smell of gunpowder and smoke filled the tiny room. In quick succession a series of shots rang out. Bang, bang, at least eight to ten shots reverberated through the ship. There was shouting, then absolute quiet.



“Carlos, Luis,” I called.

Just silence.

I struggled to get up. I tried not to even look down where the captain was lying. His was splattered everywhere. It was on me, the wall, and the table. His ugly face now looked like a grotesque mask. I was sore as hell between my legs. I felt dampness, but I was afraid to look fearing it was . I got to my feet and stepped over the dead man lying in the doorway. The room across the hall’s door was in splinters having been kicked in. I could see Carlos and Luis sitting on the floor tied back to back with tape over their mouths. I saw the look on their faces. I had all over my mouth. Pieces of the captain’s head were sticking to my chest. I must have looked like a horror movie victim to them.

I hadn’t heard a single voice since the shooting stopped. I got down on my knees and crawled to my brother and Luis. I began removing the ropes. Carlos grabbed me and held me.

“Are you hurt?” he asked fearing the worst.

I looked like a slaughter had occurred on top of me. I managed to say I was not shot, “ I’m Okay.” We held each other, afraid to even leave the room. Luis finally crept into the hallway. The guy who had shot the captain was crumpled in the door-frame. As we made our way up to the open deck we stepped over the one crewman who was not moving. Out on the deck the remaining three guys were lying on the deck, one was still moving. We saw the girl the captain had left driving the boat. She was tangled awkwardly into the steering wheel. She was still sitting on the pilot’s seat, but was pooling on the white deck beneath her. She had been shot in the head from behind. Her face had been horribly distorted. The other crewman was slumped against a box just outside the door. It was a horrible scene, as bad as any massacre could be.

The lone survivor was on his side groaning and still holding onto the black bag he had carried on board. Luis saw that his gun had been knocked from his hand. He was moaning and struggling to keep hold of the bag. Luis went to his side. The poor man was mortally wounded. seeped from where he lay. He could hardly speak, but was asking for water. Carlos went below and found a drinking cup and filled it with some water from a cooler. By the time he got back, the man had ceased breathing.

I went back down into the room where the captain lay dead. I picked through my clothing on the floor and found something to cover me. I opened the drawer where he had hidden our money and stuffed it back into my back-pack along with the rest of my clothes. I saw the drugs still sitting on the table splattered with his . I just couldn’t touch them.

When I had gotten my clothes back on, I went back out to the deck. Carlos and Luis were both standing in the middle of the boat surveying the carnage. We weren’t exactly sure what had just happened. Apparently everyone on board who was armed ed everyone else. Luis told me the one guy had kicked in the room door where they were being held, after hearing my screams. He heard my screaming again and went to the captain’s room where he shot him. He was then ed by the crewman who came up from behind him. A hail of gunfire ended the life of the girl and her boyfriend and all seemed to have ed one another.

We could only guess maybe the men with the bags thought the boat crew was robbing each person one at a time, and maybe figured they would be next.I told Luis of the captain’s call to the Sinaloa cartel. And how he had sent video of me with the dope spread out in front of me. They would be expecting me to be handed over once the boat made land. Luis was just staring into the dark. He seemed to be trying to put things in some order. The insanity of all the deaths left us in a situation. Luis was trying to cope with it all.

Carlos was over where the four men were originally sitting. The three bags they had carried on board were along-side their dead bodies. was splattered all over the place. Carlos unzipped the bags and was stunned to find a huge load of drugs. The two big bags held a stash of drugs packaged into brick-like shapes. The last bag was the one which caught all of our attention. Cash, hundreds of thousands of dollars, stacks of it. All banded and put in marked bundles. This was a huge amount. It wasn’t possible to even estimate how much, a million dollars maybe, or even more. Luis was still considering our options at this point.

The captain’s friend would call sometime and what were we to do? Luis was slowly putting together a plan. He thought that if we could power the boat to at least within sight of US territory we could jump overboard and drift to shore on some flotation. If the coastal authorities spotted the moving boat later and gave chase, we might go unnoticed and make it to shore. No one other than the Sinaloa cartel really knew of our existence on the boat.

We went back into the captain’s cabin to retrieve our backpacks and the rest of our clothing. Carlos asked about the drugs still sitting on the captain’s table. Luis said to leave them. The drugs would be impossible to get to shore with. But here they might serve a purpose. We took the cash in the captain’s wallet which he had taken from us. Luis pulled the captain’s pants back up and left him where he had fallen. He took his cell phone and kept it.

The cash in the bag was in itself going to be a challenge getting it to shore. No one would know it was here except the owners and they didn’t know about us being on board.

Luis found plastic garbage bags in a small compartment and began wrapping our backpacks and the money bag. There were plenty of old flotation vests and floats which wouldn’t be missed. We left the bodies lie were they fell. Any investigation by US authorities would find things just as they happened. Carlos was questioning Luis about all drugs value, but Luis’s idea was to erase any trace to us being on board.

“But what about the drugs we brought with us,” Carlos questioned.

“Only the Sinaloa will know Maria was here.

“Leave all the drugs,” he finally snapped, “The money is more than enough. Do not be greedy in this,” Luis warned.

“Besides, just who would we sell this all too? We are not drug dealers!”

Carlos and Luis lifted the poor girl off the pilot’s station. They set her face-down gently on the deck. The poor girl didn’t deserve any of this. But still, Luis had me find the girl’s purse inside, and any identification she had on her. He thought I might need a new identity once in the US. We kept her cell phone also.

We waited for the signal from the captain’s accomplice. Eventually a ping, and a text came. It just stated “all clear.”

Luis was able to get the boat moving again. Even though the vessels control panel was well-equipped with navigation devices, I saw Luis bring out the small compass from his pocket and hold it level in the palm of his hand. Luis was not an emotional guy, but as he looked out into the pitch-black waters ahead, I know I saw a tears forming in his eyes. His Papa’s hand was upon his shoulder in that moment, and he was once again guiding us.

We ran at the best speed the boat would go. We wouldn’t see any lights for almost two hours. None of us knew exactly where we were at until Carlos realized we could use the dead girl’s cell phone’s GPS.

We got within 5 miles of Corpus Christi and could clearly see lights along the shoreline. Luis cut the speed back to maybe half. He put the cell phone back in the captain’s cabin and used one of the guns lying on the deck to fire a bullet through it destroying any memory it contained. We had readied our back-packs and the money bag. Luis took one last look around. He could think of nothing else we needed to do. We climbed on the back railing and together we all jumped.

The water was warm. It actually felt good to wash away all reminder of the horror of that night. In a strange way it was almost like a baptism of sorts, a cleansing and a new beginning for us in a new place. The boat continued on its way.

It took us more than an hour to drift to land. We took the jackets and flotation with us because Luis didn’t want any evidence of us left along the shoreline. We placed it in a residential dumpster as we made our way inland. We waited until morning in a thick grove of trees. Even though we were soaked, the warm gulf breeze eventually dried out our clothing as the morning sun rose. Luis went on ahead and found a cheap local hotel which gave us a place to lie-low for a couple days.

Luis was returning from the market on the third morning with sandwiches for lunch. I was curled up on the couch. He dropped a local newspaper down in front of me. I could speak better English than I could read it, but I was able to make some sense out of it by stringing enough words together. On the bottom of the front page, a story read.

“Authorities reported finding a pilot-less fishing boat run aground. The vessel was registered to a Mexican national named Jose Ramirez, a long suspected Los Zeta cartel drug smuggler. All of the eight persons on board had been found shot to death. The bodies of seven men and one young female were recovered. Drugs from competing Sinaloa and Jalisco cartels were found aboard leading authorities to believe this was a mutual robbery attempt having gone bad.“

I looked up to Luis who had the biggest grin I had ever seen.

“The Sinaloa thinks that you are dead.”

Epilogue:

You know, money can’t replace a lost past, but it can certainly help with a brighter future. The bag Carlos carried all the way to Tucson, Arizona contained over 1.4 million dollars. We took buses from San Antonio all the way across to Arizona.

Uncle Enrico, my aunts and Momma made contact with us near Nogales. It took about six months to bribe local lawyers to get them admitted to the USA. As they say here, “Money talks.” We have all settled in the Tucson area. Uncle Enrico has a thriving business due to a little financial help getting started. Momma and my aunts are living life “grande.”

I would like to believe that no innocent people suffered because of me, but I often think about that girl on the boat that night. I don’t know if she was a bad person or not. I was only with her for a few hours. Maybe she was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but in her death, I was reborn. I used her id cards to get us bus tickets all the way to Arizona. Her death lifted the cartel’s search for me. I buried her purse, her id cards, and her memory in a beautiful spot in the dessert.

Her name was Maria.

End.

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